Toronto Relationship Clinic

A Therapist's Journal

reflections and meditations

from along the way…

Inner Critic to Inner Critique

Where did you learn that you weren’t enough? Who told you that you were lacking? When did you stop believing in the implicit worth, dignity, value, completeness, and beauty of your soul and personhood? Do you even remember?

Was it the parent who never saw past their own pain long enough to acknowledge yours? Was it religion reminding you every week that you are and always will be a wretched sinner? Was it the bully who made you feel small and fearful and like you didn’t belong? Was it the teacher whose favour you desired but they never noticed no matter how hard you tried? Was it an experience so treacherous that even putting words to your suffering causes sadness and anger and disgust to rise up in you?

When did you internalize the message that you weren’t enough? Whose voice became your inner critic? Whose pain and insecurity are you carrying?

When will you give yourself a chance to process it and let it go?

Because you, darling, are an exquisite piece of universe wrapped in skin. Heart, lungs, brain, and creativity. You are an expression of love, and truth, and all that is divine. You are light and energy and spirit-breathed flesh. Your strength is your tenderness. Your secret weapon is your tenacity. At your core is beauty.

What will it take for you to truly believe just how remarkable you are?

Love and light, beloveds.

Benita Joy